One more reason why I can never live in the suburbs

http://www.somethingawful.com/articles.php?a=3800

A few things about suburbanites that Zack does not mention:
1. They think it is acceptable to leave the house in anything with a drawstring and/or elastic waistband. (Sidenote: I have recently noticed they also allow their children to leave the house in pajama pants.)
2. The women all have the same haircut. It is a choppy, Meg Ryan circa 1995 (Think "French Kiss") that never looks adorably gamine ala Meg, but always looks like the crazed mother of four has just cut her own hair with a kitchen knife ala Kathy Bates.
3. No one outside of the perimeter drives a car that weighs less than 6,000 pounds.